Daylight Day 19: Questacon
Caught Pi measuring Ed’s fringe. “When do you start experimenting on him?” I asked.
He said, “Soon. I’m gathering data.”
Still not EMO.
*
Pi said, “Should we ungag Ed? Mum and Dad are fine with him being here.”
“No,” I said, “If we did that, he might start talking again.”
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Questacon the National Science and Technology Centre is probably the most enjoyable tourist attraction in Canberra – especially the freefall slide (which cunningly demonstrates the science of gravity) – it’s a slide about five metres high.
It’s polished daily (which I know, because I used to work there – and we’d finish off the polish job by going down the slide ourselves). It can be scary, though – some over-enthusiastic parents have pressured their children so hard that the child has literally (and yes I know what that word means) pooed their pants.
My two favourite galleries are “Awesome Earth” (which includes an earthquake house and artificial lightning), and “MiniQ”. “MiniQ” is ONLY for 6-year olds and their families – others aren’t allowed in. It has a tiny bakery, tiny construction site, underwater sensory world (complete with mysterious squishy things in holes) and. . . . a water play area. Borrow a child, take a camera, and don’t forget a change of clothes.
Daylight Day 18: Poetry
Still not EMO, despite Dad cornering me in the laundry to lecture me on the meaninglessness of his existence. Hope we find a cure.
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Okay you asked for it*
This certainly proves my claims to emo-ness.
The following poem is the first piece of writing I ever had published for money (on January 14, 1996, in The Canberra Times – which used to have a “Junior Times” section – when I was thirteen). Keep a bucket handy, people.
GOODBYE
Goodbye
I have to go
Leave you behind
My friend.
I don’t want to go
I will write
and so will you
But not all the time
Not looking at the blue sky
the trees, the water
the sea
Sharing happiness, sadness
love and fear.
Not any more.
We will change
Be different
not know each other.
I will come back
But not the same
to meet a different person
Be a different person.
I will miss you
Goodbye.
*Actually no-one ever did or would, but so?
Daylight Day 17: Bell vs Bella
Ed called and said, “My Mum wants to know how you got that lovely green in your hair.”
“Well, I –”
“Oh, what’s the point?!” he cried.
*
Pi and I snuck over, gagged Ed, and dragged him home. He sparkled all the way. We locked him in the spare room with a saucer of rat’s blood.
*
Still not EMO, despite Ed’s slurping of his rat blood. He always was a messy eater. Now he stinks too (he owns only one all-black outfit).
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Differences:
While Bella’s parents are a bit dopey, at least they didn’t name their daughter after a musical instrument.
Bell has a younger brother.
Bell’s hair is naturally black (then green), whereas Bella’s is brown.
Bell actually gets annoyed when her boyfriend is annoying.
Similarities:
Both stay with their very emo/EMO boyfriends. Both don’t seem to mind their boyfriend wants to drink their blood. Both are charmingly clutzy, and not the brightest spark in the fire.
Both have a horrible fate in store.
Daylight Day 16: Poetry
I said to Pi, “You know how you wanted to experiment on Ed? Go for it.” “Thank you thank you!”
It was great to see his childish joy.
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I’m too old to be emo, but all the elements are there. Including the poetry. For days now I’ve had a particular poem (of mine) in my head – mercifully, I can only remember a few lines. I’m proud to say this has never seen the light of day (and never should).
Brace yourselves. Here it is (insulting comments most welcome):
. . . Alone
In a crowd.
Lonely
Among friends. . .
Daylight Day 15: Story so far
2 Oct
EMO used to stand for ‘emotional’ – the teen subgroup that’s only happy to be sad. Now it’s become a disease eerily similar to vampirism.
*
My name’s Bell. I considered being EMO once, but then I saw a pretty butterfly and got over myself. Got bored and decided to save the world.
*
This is the documentary tale of the brave few fighting to find a cure for EMO (or, failing that, a quick and easy way to kill all those vampires dead).
3 Oct
In Civic, Ed kissed me and sighed. “Oh, Bell. Cloudy days are so deep.”
“Oh no!” I cried. “Ed, tell me you haven’t been bitten by an EMO!”
*
He didn’t laugh once at our preview of “Saw VI”. I yanked him into a rare patch of sun – and he sparkled. My boyfriend had turned EMO!
*
Finally he confessed: “My mum bit me.”
“Your MUM!?”
He sighed, “Sad, I know.”
“Do you want to drink my blood now?”
“Er. . . no,” he lied.
4 Oct
On the news: “The EMO subculture has now become a pandemic. EMO teens can be recognised by their depression, dark clothes, and bad poetry.”
*
I walked in the yard just as Mum set some weeds on fire. “Mum,” I said through the smoke, “Ed’s EMO.”
“That’s nice dear.”
*
My name’s pretty bad, but my brother is Pi. He’s ten and wears a labcoat. I told him, “Ed’s EMO.”
“Hm. Can I do experiments on him?”
“NO!”
5 Oct
“Ed, it’s the holidays. Don’t you feel a LITTLE happy?”
“No,” he said. “Bell, would it be okay if I drank you – just a little?”
“NO!”
*
“Exodermal Melanin Occlusion is spreading fast,” the news said. “Symptoms now include sparkling in sunshine, darkening hair, and whining.”
*
Ed tried to bite me, and I tripped over another EMO as I dodged him. Bruised my knees. Still not EMO, despite my black hair and long fringe.
6 Oct
Still not EMO, despite drenching rain. All the EMOs are thrilled they’re not sparkling today (Ed almost smiled). Bring back the sun!
*
“Cheer up,” said Mum, “I’ve decided to have a wedding.”
“But. . . you’re married.”
“Don’t spoil it. It’s exactly what all those EMOs need.”
7 Oct
I was dying my hair when Ed called. “Want to play EMO baseball with my family?”
“No.”
He cried until I hung up.
My hair turned green. Oops.
8 Oct
Pi asked me for Ed’s old hairbrush, so I humoured him and brought it. He said, “Bell, I think there might be a cure for EMOs!”
*
Still not EMO, although Ed keeps trying to bite me. Awkward!
9 Oct
Mum said, “Don’t you just love weddings?”
“Does Dad even know?”
“Hush,” said Mum.
Our shopgirl wept quietly as she pinned Mum’s dress.
10 Oct
“Do you think a wedding could cure EMOs?” I asked.
Pi snorted and said, “Has Ed bitten you at all?”
“No, we just make out.”
Pi looked ill.
11 Oct
I saw Dad writing a journal and looking mournful. Uh-oh. Still not EMO myself, despite blood-starved boyfriend and lime green hair.
*
“Don’t let ANYONE drink your blood,” said the news. “Authorities recommend hitting EMOs with cricket bats. Stay alert, not alarmed.”
12 Oct
Ed wore an overcoat and hat to school. Our teachers freaked and put him in detention. I think he bit Mr Joh, the science teacher. Awkward!
*
Ed and I wandered the mall and saw heaps of decorations. Ed sighed, “Christmas is so deep. It makes me feel all –”
“Sad?”
“How’d you know?”
13 Oct
Mr Joh burst into tears while telling us about the reproductive cycle of fruit flies. Ed gave him tissues. This EMO pandemic is so wrong.
14 Oct
Maths class was full of sighs and weeping. (Life hasn’t changed much.) I was put on detention for being insensitive about life’s deep pain.
*
The principal ran detention. He looked thirsty. I shrank in my seat. “Tomorrow,” he told me, “come to my office. Bring your school spirit.”
15 Oct
I brought my school spirit and a cricket bat. The principal grabbed my arm but I whacked him and dived under his desk until the bell rang.
*
Still not EMO, despite listening to principal discuss philosophy for the entire lunch hour. Thank you, cricket bat, thank you.
16 Oct
Ed took me to a graveyard for a date. It was crowded. He licked me on the neck, and I kneed him in the groin. “Don’t you love me?” he wept.
*
Still not EMO, despite kneeing EMO boyfriend in the groin. Actually, that was pretty fun.
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And the weekly disclaimer: I’m making fun of the extreme end of emo stereotypical culture – not emo people (who have enough of a sense of humour to laugh at themselves, I suspect).
There’s a little emo in all of us. Me especially (I promise at least one blog will include my own – published and paid! – emo poetry. . . you have been warned!)
Daylight Day 14: Shaun of the Dead
I brought my school spirit and a cricket bat. The principal grabbed my arm but I whacked him and dived under his desk until the bell rang.
Still not EMO, despite listening to principal discuss philosophy for the entire lunch hour. Thank you, cricket bat, thank you.
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This is the point in the story that I realised my vampires were more than slightly zombie-like (this, and the infamous “kill them all” line). Consciously or otherwise, “Shaun of the Dead” will always be in my mind.
Lurking.
Daylight Day 13: School
Maths class was full of sighs and weeping. (Life hasn’t changed much.) I was put on detention for being insensitive about life’s deep pain.
The principal ran detention. He looked thirsty. I shrank in my seat. “Tomorrow,” he told me, “come to my office. Bring your school spirit.”
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This blog entry is rated PG for violence.
I once dreamed I was Buffy (who doesn’t, really?) and I was lured to my old primary school where the principal* was the leader of a gang of vampires. It was an ambush! ARG!!
On another occasion, I dreamt of a battle on the school oval, and distinctly saw the principal using the severed head of a long-haired student as a flail (that’s a weapon where a heavy object hangs from a rope or chain, so it gets extra velocity when swung at an enemy). Later on in the same dream, I was attempting to assist several wounded 6th-graders and was utterly at a loss due to their dozens of deep gashes, crushed limbs, etc. Then I noticed one of the girls had a bullet hole. “Oh thank goodness,” I thought. “I can cover THAT with a bandaid.”
The moral of this story is that school is scary BEFORE the EMO vampires take over.
*not actually the principal, but it makes the story better – and less track-down-who-it-really-was-able.
Daylight Day 12: Buffy VS Edward
Mr Joh burst into tears while telling us about the reproductive cycle of fruit flies. Ed gave him tissues. This EMO pandemic is so wrong.
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All I can say is that I stumbled across this by accident, and – you’re welcome. Go thou to this site, and watch the video of Buffy VS Edward.
Daylight Day 11: School
Ed wore an overcoat and hat to school. Our teachers freaked and put him in detention. I think he bit Mr Joh, the science teacher. Awkward!
Ed and I wandered the mall and saw heaps of decorations. Ed sighed, “Christmas is so deep. It makes me feel all –”
“Sad?”
“How’d you know?”
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It’s a sad fact that today, students all over Canberra are going back to school. You have my deepest sympathy.
How to tell if your science teacher has turned EMO:
1. He/She sparkles in sunshine.
2. He/She suddenly decides to teach poetry instead of physics this week.
3. He/She has what the Buffyverse calls “neck rupture”.
4. He/She weeps quietly during the lesson.
5. He/She attempts to bite you and drink your blood.
Remember kids, stay alert, not alarmed – and keep your cricket bat within arm’s reach.
Daylight Day 10: Canberra
I saw Dad writing a journal and looking mournful. Uh-oh. Still not EMO myself, despite blood-starved boyfriend and lime green hair.
“Don’t let ANYONE drink your blood,” said the news. “Authorities recommend hitting EMOs with cricket bats. Stay alert, not alarmed.”
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“Daylight” is set in Canberra (Australia’s capital), since that’s where I live.
Canberra has a population of 300,000 (yes, I know) and is conveniently located three hours from Sydney. We’re infamous for cold Winters (including biting winds from the snowy mountains nearby), and get snow about once a decade. On the other hand, one of the great things about Canberra is that we have very few murders here.
Hurrah!
Felicity Banks 