Dr Yes: Complete Story
FYI: the program of daily awesomeness begins later today.
The next twittertale, “Bridezilla”, begins April 1.
DR YES
1.
I unclipped Yen’s handcuffs and went down on one knee under the tropical sun of her prison-island home. “My darling, will you marry me?”
*
“’Kay,” she said.
I stood and kissed her tenderly, then ran for the chaplain. When he was ready to go, I decided to freshen up.
* (3 hour gap)
I emerged resplendent to find the priest knocked out, my ornithopter gone, and my fiancé. . . well, she was obviously still doing her hair.
2.
The love of my life, gone! She may still be cross that I killed her power-mad mum. But surely she doesn’t STILL want to destroy the world?
*
Time to be a super-handsome super-spy again. Thank goodness for plastic surgery. Yen was born in Beijing, so I got a flight there at once.
*
I was met at the airport by a strangely attractive nun who took me deep underground before telling me the horrible truth: “Yen’s my cousin.”
3.
In laws! They’re always so tetchy. I let the nun torture me a few hours and then knocked her out with a high-kick to the face. Then I fled.
4.
I searched for Yen in the shopping district. As I tried on an especially snazzy shirt in the back, I heard the nun’s nasal tones.
*
The evil nun was apparently in league with my shopkeeper! A deadly pair! I duct-taped shut the mouths of the other patrons and listened in.
*
“Yen’s in Beijing – and so’s that British superspy,” said the nun.
The shopkeeper said, “We’ll kill them both!”
“Perfect. Hey, nice shirts!”
5.
I bought hundreds of TV and streetside ads warning Yen of her mortal danger – and asking her to pretty please return my ornithopter.
*
As I returned to my hotel after another day of searching, I found a single long-stemmed black rose on my pillow. She still loved me!
6.
I spotted Yen trying on shoes and gave chase. She was too quick, but I taped my two high-tech matchbox cars to my feet for more speed.
*
Matchbox-car skating requires the perfect balance that only MI6 training can give. Unfortunately it’s been a while and I crashed into Yen.
*
I clicked my sleeping-gas pen in her face and carried her over the threshold into my – our – hotel room until she regained consciousness.
7.
Yen awoke, but didn’t seem to appreciate the scattered rose petals or the scented candles surrounding her. Then she peeled off her mask!
*
I gasped, “Mrs Fu!”
“In the flesh!”
“But. . . I threw you into a volcano. I think your daughter may still be miffed.”
“Mums are made tough.”
8.
After we’d caught up on the latest in international spy goss, Mrs Fu and I tested one another with tea. I gave her just a pinch of arsenic.
*
I tasted my own tea cautiously. Cyanide, yes. But only a token amount. Mrs Fu and I understood one another perfectly: no death – for now.
*
Mrs Fu said she knew exactly where Yen was hiding. We caught a train to the Great Wall. “Um, isn’t the Great Wall rather. . . long?” I said.
9.
We searched all night and day. Suddenly we found ourselves surrounded by Shaolin monks. “He’s with me,” said Mrs Fu.
They said, “We’re not.”
*
I grabbed my trusty blow-up gum but the monks wore titanium robes. No fair! They whipped out pens – strangely familiar pens. Noooo!!!
*
10.
Regained consciousness briefly while having a dream about killer mushrooms. One of the monks hit me on the head, and the mushrooms returned.
11.
I awoke strapped to the Great Wall with my own duct tape. Had intense déjà vu. Mrs Fu was taped beside me, and so was a black rose.
*
“It’s all right Mrs Fu – Yen must be safe if she’s given me a rose.”
“Great. End of story then. I’m afraid Yen no longer needs our help.”
*
I said, “But. . . it can’t be the end. I haven’t done anything heroic yet.”
“Why don’t you heroically help me down, then?” said Mrs Fu.
12.
Mrs Fu and I walked back along the wall while she tried to explain something about my relationship with Yen. I’m sure it wasn’t important.
*
My shoe phone rang. I answered, “Bind. Jimmy Bind.”
“HQ here. We need you to track the fugitive Yen Fu. Naturally she’s been microchipped.”
*
Mrs Fu and I followed the beeps back to a cunningly disguised lair beneath the Great Wall. We hid ourselves outside and waited.
13.
A Shaolin monk came out, and Mrs Fu kicked him in his monk parts. I clicked him with sleeping gas, and we dragged him into the bushes.
*
Another monk! I barrelled out and hurled him to the ground. He punched me in the belly but I bashed his head against his titanium robe.
*
Yen emerged. “Mu-um! You couldn’t just knock?”
“They drugged us,” I said.
Yen shrugged: “Boys will be boys. Won’t you come in?”
14.
Mrs Fu said, “Jimmy here found out something useful.”
Yen’s jaw dropped (I’m not sure why): “What did you find out?”
I told her everything.
*
Yen said, “Hmm. Thanks for that, guys. What do you say we go kill my evil cousin?”
“Sounds good,” said Mrs Fu.
I said, “I’m in.”
15.
The monks were hurt we beat them up. Lucky monks are so forgiving. They helped us build a boat out of duct tape so we could travel quickly.
*
On our way to Beijing, we were hurled ashore by a massive waterfall. I could have sworn the monks didn’t mention it – or my ornithopter.
*
As we walked the last kilometres to Beijing, I picked flowers for Yen and said, “Thanks for the roses.”
“What roses?” she said.
16.
We searched the shopping district for hours without finding the nun or the shopkeeper. The two Fus were disheartened.
*
Success at last! Still no sign of the evil nun, but I found some pants that are simply divine.
17.
We were perfectly innocently walking along when the nun attacked! She tossed Yen away like a doll and blasted Mrs Fu with a shotgun.
*
Yen shouted, “You never mentioned she was a NUN!”
“Oops!” I said, and spat my blow-up gum.
My gum missed the nun and incinerated a hotel.
*
Twenty more nuns appeared and Yen backflipped away. I threw one of my cars at the first nun’s head and she dropped, but I was overwhelmed.
18.
It was nice to be back in the ol’ torture chamber. Yen’s cousin smirked, “Did you like my roses?”
I gasped, “That was YOU!?!”
Mrs Fu sighed.
*
I speak thirty-two languages, but Yen spoke one I didn’t know: “Ixnay on the osesray! Immyjay’s inemay!”
What could she possibly have said?
*
Yen never had a yen for me! She only became my fiancé to get off the isle of her imprisonment. What a fool I am! But I still love her.
19.
The nun tortured me alone, and suddenly switched to Barry White and more black roses. I recognise the signs of Jimmy fever when I see them!
*
I said, “You’re a very pretty. . . nun. . . but I’m engaged.”
She put me in the electric chair. We certainly had a spark, but I loved Yen.
20.
The nun challenged Yen to fisticuffs over me. She landed a fabulous right hook, but Yen high-kicked her in the face. We escaped!
*
I sighed, “Now I REALLY want to marry you.”
“Yes!” said Yen.
I gasped and said, “Are you free tomorrow?”
She smiled, “Yes.”
21.
When I saw Yen in her red wedding dress walking toward me, with her dark eyes sparkling, I swallowed my blow-up gum. Then the nuns attacked!
*
Twelve evil nuns somersaulted over the reserved seats to pummel my darling. I ran to fight but there were so many! Then the monks joined in!
*
Two nuns grappled a monk as Yen twisted to yank an enemy’s starched headdress, throwing her to the ground. “This is MY day!” Yen shrieked.
22.
Yen yawned and stretched: “Time to rejoin the fight?”
“Whatever you like, my dear.”
We had breakfast and went back to the church.
*
The nuns and monks were down to three on three – including Yen’s cousin. I went straight for her, and punched her right in the kisser.
*
The fight dispersed quickly. Yen and I shot her mad cousin (four times each), then blew her up. Just to be sure.
23.
Yen and I rested while we discussed possible honeymoon destinations. She borrowed my shoe and called her Mum for a long talk.
*
“Mum took the nun pieces and tossed them in a volcano.”
“How reassuring. Is Mrs Fu OK?”
“Tired. Says she wants to retire somewhere sunny.”
24.
I had a brilliant idea, and snuck over to Mrs Fu’s house.
“You’re nabbed!” I said.
She said, “Never!” and kicked me so hard I saw stars.
*
Luckily Mrs Fu’s kick also set off my sleeping-gas pen – and I woke up first. I tied her up and left her with a note at a friend’s lair.
25.
Yen expertly flew my – our – ornithopter back to the tropical island where I proposed. Mrs Fu was waiting for us in her own luxury cell.
*
Yen said, “Oh, sweetheart, you shouldn’t have!”
Mrs Fu said, “No really. You SHOULDN’T have. Although. . . it IS sunny.”
THE END
Dr Yes: How to have a free wedding
This post is tangentially related to both “Dr Yes” and the upcoming “Bridezilla” tale (which will happen in April).
How to have a free wedding:
The important thing to note is that weddings are expensive because of one thing: expectations. Yours, your fiance’s, your Mum’s, his/her Mum’s, the two Dads, your other relatives, and your friends – in roughly that order. The most important thing is to not ruin any of those crucial relationships. Keep that in mind every day, and be careful to both ask and observe what people expect from your wedding (most people don’t realise what they expect until it’s not there). Make sure you give people plenty of notice of the date – which may have to change (long engagements are also good for scrounging – the more time you have, the more likely you are to find/be given something really excellent), especially if they need to travel.
A “perfect wedding” is a myth. It is most certainly NOT the most important day of your life. Spend your time and money on your marriage, not your wedding.
The dress: Get it from a relative, or someone else’s cupboard. Do not lose or gain weight after you’ve found one that fits. (Cheap option: scour op shops. Mine was $200 from Vinnies.) Be careful of the dress because adjusting, ironing and dry cleaning are all expensive. If it doesn’t come with a veil, make a wreath of live flowers/leaves on the day.
The venue and MC: If you go to a church, you can almost certainly use both church and preacher for free. Otherwise, use a JP (justice of the peace). There are a LOT around. I had friends decorate my church with a huge amount of real ivy (it was a big job, though – thanks boys!) and had friends bring their own swords (seriously) for the ushering (and a grand entrance).
Paperwork: Don’t change your name. It’s difficult and costs around $100 (because you need to buy a form to prove you’re married).
Reception: Have guests bring a plate for afternoon tea. I love the communal feel of this method – and it’ll save you literally thousands. If you must have a reception, be aware that it’ll almost certainly be your biggest expense. Search for creative options – do you know a chef? Can reception be very small, or just dessert? Do you know someone with access to lots of cheap wine? Can you have a lunch reception – perhaps outside/a giant picnic?
Cake: Have a special friend make your cake as their present – or make it yourself the day before. (Be careful – people freak out when they’re involved at all, so give them a lot of reassurance.)
Engagement ring and wedding rings: You really need to have inherited jewellery for this, or to be ironic (eg plastic rings – that’s hard to pull off though). Otherwise, scour op shops for cheap rings – no-one will know your tin ring isn’t white gold. Keep in mind that “diamonds are forever” is an advertising slogan invented by diamond sellers. Stay strong as the industry pressures you to spend spend spend.
Flowers: Pick them – this is a great job for friends that are close but not bridesmaids. (Or a poor friend/s who wants to give you something special.)
Hair and makeup: Bridesmaids can help one another.
Outfits: Have a theme rather than buying new dresses (or make your bridal party buy their own). Eg. everyone wears red. Scour all the bridesmaid’s cupboards for outfits that will work together (good for a massive girlyfest). The groomsmen will all have black trousers and shoes, so that’s a good start. In my wedding, all the girls and I went barefoot. Shoes are evil. Remember that. (We also all had white sandals, so we wore those after the ceremony.)
Bridal meltdown: A wedding is probably the most stressful thing in the world – especially when you’re poor. Give yourself a break – your favourite food, days off, dates with your fiance (who’ll probably also need a break) without talking about the wedding, etc. Have a gift registry (if you’re poor it’s WONDERFUL) and put at least three non-useful items on it.
Honeymoon: See if you can housesit somewhere – ask around (even if it’s in your own town – just don’t tell anyone you’re so close, or it’ll be hard to resist the real world). Or borrow camping equipment and camp out. The most important thing is to have a break and to relax with your partner, so as long as you’re not at work it’s all good. Some people will give you money, and it’s very legitimate to spend that for your honeymoon. If you’re brilliant, you’ll housesit for a day or two before the wedding, so you have food and normal clothes from day 1.
Cars: Borrow it/them. The owner may like to drive. (Be considerate – I have a friend whose car is constantly getting borrowed. If in any doubt, tell them it’s their present to you.) I borrowed a BMW 🙂
Hens and Bucks nights: house parties, camping, bonfires, slumber parties, etc – they’re all free. Whatever YOU like to do will be done. So enjoy! This is your chance to force people to play monopoly, to dress as ducks, or to play with barbies – take advantage!
Invitations: Make them (this takes a long time though!) If you’re lucky, you know someone with beautiful writing style (perhaps use them just for relatives and close friends, or make it their present to you, or something).
Photos: With digital cameras and a willing friend/s, this is so easy (then you email photos to people as thank-you gifts – easy!) If you have friends take hundreds of photos, you’re guaranteed to get some great shots (and you can throw away the rest).
Music: Burn mix CDs and use whatever sound system comes with the venue/home.
Thank yous: Use photos and personal messages.
And that’s it! A free wedding. But I recommend you pick one thing to spend money on, because spending money is. . . well, it’s the most strongly-held wedding tradition in the world. And “tradition” is another word for “expectation”.
Dr Yes: Making Every Day Awesome
This blog is going to go through some changes in the next few months.
First, I’ll be launching a “proper” author page, with interactive stuff and links to stories and so on (that’ll take a while).
Second, I read such a brilliant post here: http://steffmetal.com/101-ways-to-cheer-yourself-up/ that I’ve decided to do every single thing on the list (with the possible exception of a hot air balloon ride) and blog about it. I’ll fill it out with a list of my own (which I already have), with other online lists of similar bent (most of which are sappy, so I’ll leave out anything that annoys me), and with suggestions from you at home. I’ll still sometimes link to amazing things online, or write other interesting blog posts, but that’ll be the main focus of the blog for at least. . . probably 6-12 months. It’ll probably start in May, since there are a lot of cool links for the next twitter tale (April’s tale is about a jilted bride who becomes a con artist).
Have a fun and foolish suggestion you’d like to make me do?
Write it in the comments, and I’ll probably embrace it.
Dr Yes: This is Not Steampunk Art
. . . apparently. I certainly thought it was steampunk, but the link says it’s not. It’s still beautiful, and there’s more here: http://coilhouse.net/2010/03/ron-pippins-biomechanical-menagerie/
Dr Yes: Spy Suits for Women
Nuff said.
For a funny discussion on what spies inevitably wear, go to tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SpyCatSuit
. . . but be advised that
(a) TV tropes is highly addictive.
(b) Not every section is suitable for young or tasteful minds.
Dr Yes: Spy Food
I always thought nougat was a food that dropped whole from heaven (neatly wrapped). So imagine my surprise when my calendar (a food one – diabolical indeed) informed me that nougat was made up of ingredients, whipping, and heat.
Three things make it worthy of being part of the Jimmy Bind blog.
1. Liquid Glucose. It is the slowest-moving substance known to man. For this reason, putting the first ingredient into a saucepan takes three hours (six, if you measure it properly). If you’re ever about to be killed by a supervillain, ask to be drowned in liquid glucose. Then you’ll probably either die of old age, or walk away over the top.
2. Humidity changes how it turns out. Another reason to cook it deep inside your multi-level cave lair.
3. General sugary stickiness. Once you’ve made nougat, it’s with you for life – in the mixing bowl, saucepan, jug – on the floor, walls and benches – in your clothes and in your hair. If you want to torture someone, tell them to clean up after you. (Side note: My husband is in the kitchen, washing up, RIGHT NOW. At least now I know he’ll never leave. PS Thanks, sweetheart.)
4. I myself (technically) failed – clearly because of sabotage. (No, I don’t have a sugar thermometer. Why do you ask?) I say technically, because ending up with a sugary, vanilla-y mass is never truly a bad result.
Nutty Vanilla Nougat
1. 1 c liquid glucose. aka sweet flowing DOOM
2. 2.75 c white sugar (not caster)
3. 0.5 c honey
4. .75 c water
5. 2 large egg whites, at room temperature.
6. A pinch of salt.
7. 3 tsp vanilla essence.
8. 100g butter, at room temperature.
9. Stuff to put in (in my case, pistachios and chopped glace cherries. You may prefer to eat the souls of children, fingers of enemies, etc).
A. Grease and line a slice pan. Mix the first four ingedients in a saucepan over low heat until sugar dissolves. Simmer until it’s 121 degrees Celsius on a sugar thermometer. (Also handy for boiling unwelcome visitors.)
B. Pour one-quarter of the syrup into a jug. Set jug and saucepan aside.
C. Put egg whites and salt in a ceramic bowl. Mix on high and gradually add the contents of the jug until mixture is thick and holds its shape.
D. Reheat remaining syrup until it’s 145 degrees, then slowly add it to the meringue. (This is the point at which you removed the bleached bones of your unwelcome visitors and feed any remains to your cat.)
E. Add butter and vanilla, and beat the whole thing for five minutes.
F. Stir in your extra bits with a metal spoon, and pour it all into the pan.
G. Refrigerate for three hours or until firm.
H. Eat the whole darn thing.
I. Throw up.
Dr Yes: Story So Far
1.
I unclipped Yen’s handcuffs and went down on one knee under the tropical sun of her prison-island home. “My darling, will you marry me?”
*
“’Kay,” she said.
I stood and kissed her tenderly, then ran for the chaplain. When he was ready to go, I decided to freshen up.
* (3 hour gap)
I emerged resplendent to find the priest knocked out, my ornithopter gone, and my fiancé. . . well, she was obviously still doing her hair.
2.
The love of my life, gone! She may still be cross that I killed her power-mad mum. But surely she doesn’t STILL want to destroy the world?
*
Time to be a super-handsome super-spy again. Thank goodness for plastic surgery. Yen was born in Beijing, so I got a flight there at once.
*
I was met at the airport by a strangely attractive nun who took me deep underground before telling me the horrible truth: “Yen’s my cousin.”
3.
In laws! They’re always so tetchy. I let the nun torture me a few hours and then knocked her out with a high-kick to the face. Then I fled.
4.
I searched for Yen in the shopping district. As I tried on an especially snazzy shirt in the back, I heard the nun’s nasal tones.
*
The evil nun was apparently in league with my shopkeeper! A deadly pair! I duct-taped shut the mouths of the other patrons and listened in.
*
“Yen’s in Beijing – and so’s that British superspy,” said the nun.
The shopkeeper said, “We’ll kill them both!”
“Perfect. Hey, nice shirts!”
5.
I bought hundreds of TV and streetside ads warning Yen of her mortal danger – and asking her to pretty please return my ornithopter.
*
As I returned to my hotel after another day of searching, I found a single long-stemmed black rose on my pillow. She still loved me!
6.
I spotted Yen trying on shoes and gave chase. She was too quick, but I taped my two high-tech matchbox cars to my feet for more speed.
*
Matchbox-car skating requires the perfect balance that only MI6 training can give. Unfortunately it’s been a while and I crashed into Yen.
*
I clicked my sleeping-gas pen in her face and carried her over the threshold into my – our – hotel room until she regained consciousness.
7.
Yen awoke, but didn’t seem to appreciate the scattered rose petals or the scented candles surrounding her. Then she peeled off her mask!
*
I gasped, “Mrs Fu!”
“In the flesh!”
“But. . . I threw you into a volcano. I think your daughter may still be miffed.”
“Mums are made tough.”
8.
After we’d caught up on the latest in international spy goss, Mrs Fu and I tested one another with tea. I gave her just a pinch of arsenic.
*
I tasted my own tea cautiously. Cyanide, yes. But only a token amount. Mrs Fu and I understood one another perfectly: no death – for now.
*
Mrs Fu said she knew exactly where Yen was hiding. We caught a train to the Great Wall. “Um, isn’t the Great Wall rather. . . long?” I said.
9.
We searched all night and day. Suddenly we found ourselves surrounded by Shaolin monks. “He’s with me,” said Mrs Fu.
They said, “We’re not.”
*
I grabbed my trusty blow-up gum but the monks wore titanium robes. No fair! They whipped out pens – strangely familiar pens. Noooo!!!
*
10.
Regained consciousness briefly while having a dream about killer mushrooms. One of the monks hit me on the head, and the mushrooms returned.
11.
I awoke strapped to the Great Wall with my own duct tape. Had intense déjà vu. Mrs Fu was taped beside me, and so was a black rose.
*
“It’s all right Mrs Fu – Yen must be safe if she’s given me a rose.”
“Great. End of story then. I’m afraid Yen no longer needs our help.”
*
I said, “But. . . it can’t be the end. I haven’t done anything heroic yet.”
“Why don’t you heroically help me down, then?” said Mrs Fu.
12.
Mrs Fu and I walked back along the wall while she tried to explain something about my relationship with Yen. I’m sure it wasn’t important.
*
My shoe phone rang. I answered, “Bind. Jimmy Bind.”
“HQ here. We need you to track the fugitive Yen Fu. Naturally she’s been microchipped.”
*
Mrs Fu and I followed the beeps back to a cunningly disguised lair beneath the Great Wall. We hid ourselves outside and waited.
13.
A Shaolin monk came out, and Mrs Fu kicked him in his monk parts. I clicked him with sleeping gas, and we dragged him into the bushes.
*
Another monk! I barrelled out and hurled him to the ground. He punched me in the belly but I bashed his head against his titanium robe.
*
Yen emerged. “Mu-um! You couldn’t just knock?”
“They drugged us,” I said.
Yen shrugged: “Boys will be boys. Won’t you come in?”
14.
Mrs Fu said, “Jimmy here found out something useful.”
Yen’s jaw dropped (I’m not sure why): “What did you find out?”
I told her everything.
*
Yen said, “Hmm. Thanks for that, guys. What do you say we go kill my evil cousin?”
“Sounds good,” said Mrs Fu.
I said, “I’m in.”
15.
The monks were hurt we beat them up. Lucky monks are so forgiving. They helped us build a boat out of duct tape so we could travel quickly.
*
On our way to Beijing, we were hurled ashore by a massive waterfall. I could have sworn the monks didn’t mention it – or my ornithopter.
*
As we walked the last kilometres to Beijing, I picked flowers for Yen and said, “Thanks for the roses.”
“What roses?” she said.
16.
We searched the shopping district for hours without finding the nun or the shopkeeper. The two Fus were disheartened.
*
Success at last! Still no sign of the evil nun, but I found some pants that are simply divine.
17.
We were perfectly innocently walking along when the nun attacked! She tossed Yen away like a doll and blasted Mrs Fu with a shotgun.
*
Yen shouted, “You never mentioned she was a NUN!”
“Oops!” I said, and spat my blow-up gum.
My gum missed the nun and incinerated a hotel.
*
Twenty more nuns appeared and Yen backflipped away. I threw one of my cars at the first nun’s head and she dropped, but I was overwhelmed.
18.
It was nice to be back in the ol’ torture chamber. Yen’s cousin smirked, “Did you like my roses?”
I gasped, “That was YOU!?!”
Mrs Fu sighed.
*
I speak thirty-two languages, but Yen spoke one I didn’t know: “Ixnay on the osesray! Immyjay’s inemay!”
What could she possibly have said?
*
Yen never had a yen for me! She only became my fiancé to get off the isle of her imprisonment. What a fool I am! But I still love her.
19.
The nun tortured me alone, and suddenly switched to Barry White and more black roses. I recognise the signs of Jimmy fever when I see them!
*
I said, “You’re a very pretty. . . nun. . . but I’m engaged.”
She put me in the electric chair. We certainly had a spark, but I loved Yen.
Dr Yes: Lair
Unfortunately people with real-life lairs generally call them something sensible like, “my house”, “a castle” or, “the president’s top secret military installation”. The only place to find an honest lair is in computer games. But they’re still good and pretty.
Dr Yes: Personal Flying Machine
1- Gryphon Attack Glider
Formerly known as The ESG Gryphon Personal Flying Wing this has to be the ultimate in Spy Gear! It has a maximum glide speed of 135 mph and has a heads up display and even onboard oxygen for those high altitude launches. This baby can carry a payload of 100lbs of onboard gear and has hard mount points for hooking up tactical bombs or missiles! With a glide range of 125 miles and a radar cross section of a seagull (or Stealth Bomber) you can glide into North Korea take out The Great Leader and like Ace Rimmer be back in time for a smoked kipper for breakfast. Only thing is you’ll need an extraction team as landing is acheived by separation from the wing which will activate your parachute.
Dr Yes: Are you a heroic sidekick?
I’ve written a new kind of personality test – whether a person is a hero type or a heroic sidekick. I’m in the beginning stages of designing a much more interactive web site for my stories, and this is part of it. I need test monkeys… and that’s where YOU come in.
Please answer the questions with true or false, then put your results in the comments (along with any actual comments about the test and what you think of it). I’ll give you your personality breakdown shortly.
Hero or Heroic Sidekick?
True or False (or Neither)
1. Life without a purpose is not worth living.
2. If no-one tells me what to do, nothing much gets done.
3. I don’t mind letting someone else make the decisions.
4. I love motivating people.
5. I can handle a tough boss more easily than a tough employee.
6. I don’t like being given responsibility.
7. I make life interesting.
8. I enjoy life for what it is.
9. When my friends want something unusual, I make it happen.
10. People enjoy having me around.
11. If a job isn’t meaningful to me, I resign.
12. I struggle with my boss/es regularly.
13. I almost always get on with people. It’s not hard for me.
14. I don’t suffer fools gladly.
15. I am a natural leader.
16. I will fight to the death for something I believe in.
17. I don’t worry about the future.
18. I’m easily satisfied.
19. I am brave (or possibly stupid).
20. I am a peaceful person (or possibly lazy).
21. I suspect I’m difficult to live with.
22. If I was any more laid back, I’d be dead.
Felicity Banks 
